1. A number of different approaches are
being tried. (We are still guessing at this point.)
2. Close project coordination. (We sat
down and had coffee together.)
3. An extensive report is being prepared
on a fresh approach. (We just hired three
punk kids out of school.)
4. Major technological breakthrough! (It
works OK; but looks very hi-tech!)
5. Customer satisfaction is believed assured.
(We are so far behind schedule,
that the customer will take
anything.)
6. Preliminary operational tests were inconclusive.
(The darn thing blew up when we threw the
switch.)
7. Test results were extremely gratifying!
(Unbelievable, it actually worked!)
8. The entire concept will have to be abandoned.
(The only guy who understood the thing quit.)
9. It is in process. (It is so wrapped
in red tape that the situation is completely
hopeless.)
10. We will look into it. (Forget it! We
have enough problems already.)
11. Please note and initial. (Let's spread
the responsibility for this.)
12. Give us the benefit of your thinking.
(We'll listen to what you have to say as
long as it doesn't interfere with what we
have already done or with what we are going
to do.)
13. Give us your interpretation. (We can't
wait to hear your bull.)
14. "See me" or "Let's discuss." (Come
to my office, I've screwed up again.)
15. All new. (Parts are not interchangeable
with previous design.)
16. Rugged. (Don't plan to lift it without
major equipment.)
17. Robust! (Rugged, but more so)
18. Light weight. (Slightly lighter than
rugged)
19. Years of development. (One finally
worked)
20. Energy saving. (Achieved when the power
switch is off.)
21. No maintenance. (Impossible to fix)
22. Low maintenance. (Nearly impossible
to fix)
23. Fax me the data. (I'm too lazy to write
it down.)
24. We are following the standard!
(That's the way we have always done it!)
25. I didn't get your e-mail. (I haven't
checked my e-mail for days.)
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